I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
I feel like tequila is Gods way of lighting my fuse to do something awesome
The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
girl I've been sleeping with this summer as per her request just gave me a carton of cigs to thank me for my "hospitality". this is good.
i cannot be the only guy who has bought the every day with rachael ray magazine for use as porn
it's not like this is the first time she's brought a guy home and I'm the one who hooks up with him
The best of us have puked in our office garbage cans. I just hope yours wasn't the metal mesh kind...and bagless like mine. Rock n roll office manager.
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
No seriously you guys are gonna get arrested
Do me a favor I want you to reach down the front of your pants and underwear and just feel around for a while... if you happen to find your balls then join us
I wish I could take a screenshot of how things literally look from my eyeballs right now
we are eating waffles in the pillow fort. Still think you're too straight for a threesome?
I'll be right over.
... Okay, fine. But I don't want to be a better person tonight. I'll be a better person tomorrow.
Pretty sure we had a civil war reenactment in your kitchen at 4am.
That would explain the cannon.
Randomize
