She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
Can you bring me a pair of sunglasses to the bathroom please... Don't judge me.
we were boning in the bathroom when her boyfriend came upstairs. I wish i could remember what happened next more clearly, because it had to have been hilarious
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
It was great. They teamed up to hit on these two frat boys all night, until the frat boys started making out with each other. The looks on their faces...
I told him if he ever gets a "wink" text from me after 10:00pm to assume I really mean "we should be hooking up by 2:30am"
So this bar tattoo not looking that great now
Its not that it wasnt fun. Its just I got a tooth knocked out and that was my second time being arrested this year
Even blacked out me knows not to sleep with socks on
I just shaved my pubes into a heart shape. if that doesn't scream romantic idk what does
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
He was so wasted he lit his sink on fire with shit he found in his room....it was smokeless. Chemistry majors drunk = the coolest shit ever.
Totally writing my paper on the toilet. Makes me miss you.
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