can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
Going to a party tonight. Sorority girls will be there. Primary goal of the night: make one cry. Secondary goal: become a father.
Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
things I have learned from cosmo today- 40% of guys are uncircumsized, you can have a beer facial, and i really need to get tested for std's
Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
My bra is still on the porch...I'm leaving it as a reminder to get my shit together.
Starting the day with sex, coffee and productivity are what the founding fathers intended
My dream date: Hotdogs/nachos from the bar & tequila. Is that too much to ask?
Anyways, he came over at 3:30 am and ate me out while I ate pizza on the counter
I've really become a household name at this fraternity. Mother would be so proud.
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
So this is what bad decisions tastes like...
is it bad that there is a girl in my bed right now and the only thing i can think about is the fect that its after 3am which means i cant order jimmyjohns unitll tomorrow?
Randomize
