I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
I just saw "i'm bigger then that" as her facebook status. Would it be better to make a fat joke or correct her grammar?
I think he just gave me the 'I used to fuck your sister' discount
They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
Leave it to us to have a family reunion in a bar bathroom
i am going to show so many millionaires my nipple
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
"I made out with someone too, but then he tried to fuck and I played dead"
Eat your greens and take your tequila shots
We walking to the game and some random guy came up to to me and yelled "hey you're the whiskey guy!" And then high fived me then walked away
The bouncers found you passed out on the toilet. They tried to move you but you refused and repeatedly shouted that you wanted to go out like Elvis.
You made me promise I wouldnt let you play "fuck fuck goose" with a 40 year old ever again.
Randomize
