I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
i just realized that no matter how many potstickers i eat, i will never be asian
I think I'm going to start texting all the people that don't want to talk to me
And then falling down drunk the next morning, concussing yourself and splitting your head open?
That was pretty sad, but you more than made up for it by using "concussing" in a sentence
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
I am drunk at a castle and it isn't even 3. Europe is amazing.
i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
I have a music final in an hour so I put all the classical songs we need to know in a shower power hour playlist, beer included.
Why doesn't he get that I would rather give him blow jobs than be in a relationship?
Just for the record its a bit awkward when you introduced me to your friends at your house as your brother and then insisted in front of them that I sleep in your bed with you
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
Uhh dog found a condom. FYI its on the table by couch please dispose of it. No reply Necessary
I woke up in some kids room and he introduced me to his friends at breakfast as "Monica" so I just went with it.
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
Only you would try street racing in a Volvo.
Randomize