Also my back is semi rug burned and I'm holding you fully responsible.
I would love to give you more rug burn
i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
I didnt shave my beard last night, so I could feel it while Im shrooming today
You stood up gave the stripper 15 ones in a wad, hugged her and then sat back down.
I woke up to her staring at me in a corner moaning over and over again about how good the pie crust tasted
please tell me i can get drunk off sparkling grape juice. even if you have to lie, please say yes.
We decided to cut you off after you insisted on eating peanuts by the dumpster
The cop told you to put your hands behind your back and you slurred "I'm not falling for that again"
I NEED YOU HERE TO KNOCK THE MALT BEVERAGES OUT OF MY MOUTH
In hindsight following that black guy in the ghostbusters costume was a terrible decision on everyone's part
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
I just want to eat Taco Bell and throw it up on his doorstep.
I got so high that I ate a protein bar while in the shower. I then proceeded to leave half the protein bar and the wrapper on the ledge in my shower. Haha oh well.
So the door man at the local dispensary started giving me motivational talks about my beard...
Bring vodka when you get back from court.
Randomize
