the not having weed thing wouldnt be nearly as tragic if it wasnt the one holiday where they launch bright flaming things into the air
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
My biology professor just used the phrase "dick fairy" in a sentence. No, it didn't make more sense in context.
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
I just had someone I don't even know on Facebook message me saying it seems like I drink too much and should slow down.
Also, turning on the light this morning was a 3 step process. Way too hungover.
How the fuck did you end up in a tree? With multiple people?
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him.
Whoever roofied me last night owes me a new pair of white jeans
I just realized in a weird reversed way I hustled a stripper last night
No. Not going out tonight. No. It's Tuesday. Xanax and Full House Tuesday.
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
Randomize
