Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
she literally pooped in the closet. i sent the picture to everyone i know.
Vodka and Eggs at 9:30AM = thank you, America.
I don't know who he was, where he came from, or where he went, but he just handed me a bowl of mac and cheese and left. It was good too.
my dad just asked me if my booty call guy that comes over at 3am and leaves at 6 would like to stay for sunday brunch next week. you in?
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
booty call birthday vouchers, best idea ever. it's like giving a present to myself for someone else's birthday.
I shit you not, me and my date were in that bar and within a 10 minute window, 4 ex gf's entered. Every one clocked me and gave me evils. I swear they're conspiring.
I told her that I was going up to my room to lay in front of a fan without pants on, watching Avengers and she still wanted to get with me. I have to marry her.
I'm assuming the reason my elbow is so sore has something to do with all the broken shot glasses eh?
Yep
It might be whiskey, but I view Marge and Homer Simpson as something to strive for
Idk man, we spent like 20 mins arguing about the moral ambiguity of fucking in someone else's car
We couldn't leave for the bar until he spent 10 minutes adjusting his vaporizer. I want to drown him in beard oil.
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
Randomize
