btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
So I put about 15 worms in the cuervo bottle. I don't think that's how it works but I feel like hallucinating by 11am
I've only left my bed to pee and eat nutella out of the jar with my fingers
Noooo. We thought it would be funny for him to wake up buried in the sand. But we just remembered about the whole high tide thing and it's dark and it's pretty damn hard to find an unconscious head sticking out of the sand. Just help us out
Plus my stomach has been speaking through my ass all day sending notes saying "fuck you" and "this is from your liver" or "i will kill you."
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
I bought an american flag today and by god im gonna fuck someone on it
I got custody of our girlfriend in the breakup.
He gave me the "find somebody who wants to date you for who you are" speech while I walked around the house asking people for pants.
I am descending into that finals week rage fueled by ramen, mountain dew and bad sex is what's up.
I'm like a hairless cat ready to be ravished
Babe, holding my hair while i blow you doesn't count as being romantic
I'm definitely not mad. My best friend is dating my drug dealer, it's impossible to be mad.
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