so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
i havent had this much fun since the last time i farted and it created a boner.
How does, "Im sorry I was such an intoxicated bitch, I didn't mean anything I said" sound as an apology.
so, the parking garage attendent caught us humping in the car. long story short, we have free parking whenever we want! take that abstinence.
Giving me the bigger bowl of ramen isn't considered "romantic"
She literally just puked and rallied AT HER OWN WEDDING. Welcome to White Trash town, America.
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
You're lucky you got out when you did, about an hour later the girl in the Franzia box started wrestling everyone.
Also, did you really start discussing the weather in the middle of telling you my sexual fantasy about you?
I am truly sorry that you have to put your dog down. He was a great dog, and a great friend. I am still not showing you my tits.
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
On her way to bed she said, "If you have sex on the couch, just move my blanket" Needles to say, we moved the blanket
Is it bad form to spend company money and place an ad in the paper because I wanna nail the sales girl?
Every time our eyes meet, I silently summon him to my vagina.
It's your birthday, you should get to jizz where you want to. Jizz when you want tooo
Randomize
