singing james blunt while drunk. tell me thats not wonderful
She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
I taped Calvin and Kyles heads together face to face while they were passed out. You should have seen them stumbling around using hungover teamwork trying to find scissors.
That's the last time I get in a car with six rappers headed to god knows where.
Obviously. I'm here to let you eat things off my boobs and help you get laid.
Judging by your snapchat you're totally working on your project and definitely not singing, "The Sign" while shirtless with another man.
Im gonna get home and destroy this bag of chicken nuggets with my soul.
He was the only one not on Xanax so he holds the key to what actually happened last night
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
You almost got us killed.
YOU’RE WELCOME FOR NAVIGATING YOU TO A ONCE IN A LIFETIME EXPERIENCE.
i look like i'm walk-of-shaming but i'm really showered and re-clothed and rallying. i fool everyone
If work found out I was using THEIR paper to write Karate Kid fanfic I'd never hear the end of it.
Randomize
