You Definitely drank the goldfish bowl like it was a giant margarita
But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
I could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you
We planned for the zombie apocalypse. In great detail. Of course there was booze involved.
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
dude, you cant keep using "she roofied me" as an excuse to bang all these fat chicks
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?
"Masturbate" is an actual item on an actual ToDo list of mine. It is at the top.
I hurt myself, but I'm pretty sure I saved the carpet.
Great, now even dream!me is a drunken borderline mess.
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
It's time you knew: I have been dating your probation officer for 7 months. Pretty certain he's THE ONE. So, thanks for being a criminal.
His abs are so defined he looks like a human xylophone.
Randomize
