I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
Just successfully made home fries from potatoes we used as bowls while stoned as shit. I deserve a trophy.
No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
I had mdma, weed, and alcohol in my system. My doctor seems to think that's how I tore my groin.
You're about wine.
Yes, I'm like 90% wine at the moment
and the oscar for 'most creative swearing' goes to you for 'jesus's bloody fucksticks'
Also, there's definitely not a non-hilarious way to ask to stick something up your butt.
My mom just said we can't get married in nude body suits to look like earthworms. She's ruining my life.
i think i just lost a toe
i feel like i shouldn't just had to send a text that said "no i will not eat your ass"
I would also like you to tell your human bio class that I successfully smoked out the flu. 103 degree when I woke up yesterday. 100degree after one bowl. 4 more bowls and 16 hours later all that's left is a cough
Idk, but the girl in his story had really nice eyebrows and was singing The Climb. How about you CLIMB the fuck away from my man
FORGET THE EYEBROWS
Randomize
