He just asked me if I ever had the urge to put a zucchini in my ass.
One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
The night was doomed the minute I started taking shots with an apple as a chaser.
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
There is a dude in a thong with a Nerf axe having battles in the street. Welcome to Portland
You kept asking her which dick pills worked the best. She's a grandmother.
I was sleeping pretty good until your cat pooped loudly. I dreamed that a full grown man was pooping on my ear. It startled me.
So I got drunk last night and attempted to shave a landing strip on my vag. I now have a 8 lane highway on my crotch now. Just looks like a random ass square.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hope you get stoned and think that you're a seal in shark infested waters
I'm still, like... really stoked about not having any STDs
I just bought six bottles of the 2 dollar vodka. oh yes there will be blood
How do you teach a grown ass men how to fuck? Why is good sex so hard to find these days?
You wouldn't eat with utensils. You insisted on making your own spoon out of a bendy straw and staples while singing "I'm a survivor" by Destiny's Child.
Never underestimate the power of titties
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