New record: 45 minutes. Afterwards I played We Are The Champions while we cuddled.
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
you wrote "5 million dollars" in the tip line for the pizza delivery man and insisted that he deserves it
i may have reached my "but im high so it's cool" quota for the month.
Tipped our cab with a photo booth pic of us, a paper dollar, a dollar in quarters, a crest white strip. And a tanning pass valid in boston
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
I'm drunk at McDonald's in a fairy costume at 10 am nearly two weeks after Halloween. I don't think the Ohio State fans get it.
Well last time he got out of rehab he lasted 6 hours. So 3 days this time is quite an accomplishment.
In the last 3 months, I've slept with an ex,someone single, someone in a relationship, someone married, and someone divorced. I should get some type of grown up girl scouts badge.
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
I don't know if the fact that I carry lube in my purse means I'm living life right or I'm doing it wrong..
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
I woke up in bed spooning a vacuum cleaner
My roommate just google searched "cumming blood" using my laptop. Her boyfriend is in her room, she looks scared. Words cannot explain how hilarious this is.
When my parents ask, do you think "he was the cop I gave head to in order to get out of a speeding ticket" will suffice as to how we met?
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