Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
i wanna make it FB official so he cant fuck anyone else. but that means i can't fuck anyone else either. CONUNDRUM
I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
Gave the kid in the wheelchair at the bus stop a beer and proceede to lift him on the bus. porch drinking brings out the best in everyone
as I was walking out the door her and her roommate started singing "toot it and boot it".. I'm in love
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
I am naked in a blanket sprawled on my bed eating a pastry. This is all I want out of life. Ever.
If you ever "miss" working, I'm going to fist you with my hulk hands. BOTH of them.
I took my makeup off with mouthwash. Seemed like a good idea. It worked.
Can we go out and get blitzed in celebration that they'll be no more surprise kids
That's right. I just LL Cool J'ed you up in this bitch. Zero fucks.
He's teaching me French for free and I'm giving him blowjobs. Win-win.
Say thank you and give him a blowjob.
Randomize
