I need like a "Cookong High for Idiots" book. Or a car.
With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
that's like riding a pigeon when you could fuck a bald eagle
The polish Muslims are throwin paczkis into the crowd and I'm beer 6 before 11 am
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
Doing lines and watching a show on hot dogs around the world ... Why do I do this to myself
I found a ladder. I don't know where I am. Gonna climb it. I feel like aladin
They invented the twister shot game. You put a shot on each circle, take it when you land on it, and if you fall, they funnel the mat and make you drink it. New best friends.
I'm being fed tequila grapes by a girl on stilts...
We also had rum, but now that's all gone. Which I feel is appropriate for a pirate party.
That tingly feeling you're experiencing in your lady parts is my mustache. All the ladies of America are waking up feeling the same thing. You're welcome.
Found the cure to anxiety attacks.
An orgasm
If she's over 40, she won't believe you if you say " I'm only going to put the head in"
Well, I just bought plan b with the tips I made from the job that I slept with my manager. So yeah, that's my life. How's yours?
Let's do something tonight. I feel like setting things on fire.
Randomize
