Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
I just woke up with a bunch of French fries in my hand and a chocolate shake balancing on my pillow. Lovely.
We just passed a billboard that said to join "jerseydoesntstink.com" and literally 15 seconds later, we could smell jersey.
I planned on emotionally scarring him for life this weekend. DAMN YOU PERIOD!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This stranger told me I should "start playing for the other team" and then continued to talk to me about the joys of being a lesbian
Can you come get Dustin he's putting taco bell fire sauce on cigarettes trying to light them again.
After your flask fell out of your leg brace and you told your RA that it was juice, you tried to unlock your dorm room but your key was attached to your bra so he ended up seeing your boobs
Bryan's allergic to that cheap detergent, so he's been naked for three days. But we're all used to it now, so the party is still on.
I truly just stopped puking in my 730 am calculus class, looked up, corrected my professor, then resumed puking my eyes out. He was both impressed and disgusted.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found a video of myself completely naked on my phone giving a drunk tutorial on how to shit properly while blindfolded. Did you record it?
Happy 420. I woke up to a girl smoking weed and dragging me out of bed. Chemistry makes so much sense high.
Drunk logic "let's go outside in front of the bar to get sick"
Dislocated my knee during sex, popped it back in and kept going. Then got simpathy chipotle out of it too.
... and smoked a joint with my new landlord. I'm starting to like Germany.
The moment you tore my shirt off I knew I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you
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