Bike broken, reschedule party till thursday:(
Today's life lesson: fat girls should not wear tight miniskirts and vinyl leggings. This Forever 21 salesgirl is a hot mess.
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
Also, last night I had a dream that I was in a victoria's secret fashion show and they made me wear a t-shirt over my lingerie. Spring dieting begins now.
Omg. The nephews found my stripper pole. The scary part is theyre good at it.
I danced on the street to dubstep on a boombox for an hour with a lesbian single mother.
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
Your CAR. Is in a LAKE. I'd say "a big mess" is a pretty conservative description of the situation.
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
So bored. I think I've expelled every last gram of jizz from my body.
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
I shaved my asshole for you. You WILL fuck me tonight.
well some coke just fell out of my nose in my partners meeting so i'd say my day's off to a fantastic start
Randomize