and then he said "my sister has the same underwear!" please come get me.
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
My mouth holds just enough water for my bong
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have a cup of vodka in my bathroom with a straw in it. Yes, I am ready for this bikini wax.
There is a girl on the metro with no shoes and she's using a Crown Royal bag as a purse.
Smuggling a beer bottle full of vodka out of the bar with a tampon as a plug for the top of the bottle wasn't one of my classiest ideas... but your hangover proves it was resourceful and effective. Your welcome.
Luke did at least 8 shots of pure mayonnaise last night. I am not sure if that is better or worse than my 2 cement mixers?
THIS ISN'T WORKING THIS IS THE DRUNK LEADING THE DRUNK
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
all I'm saying is that my epic blow jobs have made grown professional football players cry in ecstasy
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
When breakfast is a rum &coke at the office Christmas party you know it's gonna be a good day
She was hammered and showed her gay best mate a pic of my cock, his response was "I fucked the wrong brother"
On a side note apparently my brother is gay
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