somebody snuck up and got me drunk
my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
got high and went straight for the Doritos. I'm some kind of walking cliche.
I wanna get so drunk next week I throw up on a guy's genitals. I want to be that memorable for someone.
i was trying to find the best way to say come over and have sex, without saying it.
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
Some guy is walking around the bar with his dick out. Health code violation?
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
yeah that bottle of rum is only the second thing I want that kid to be pulling out of his pants
He held my hand in public and I nearly came. Like he needs to be inside of me yesterday.
It is such a beautiful day to not be arrested
i just teared up watching channing tatum in drag emerge from the fog on lip sync battle. it's gotta be PMS. either that or something is realllllly wrong with me.
Of two things I'm absolutely sure: 1. I only took 2 hits off that joint and 2. I definitely ran over hedwig on the way home
Randomize
