marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
I love you!
You're insane
Fuckin crazy man! Seriously though I think if you would have me I honestly seriously think about marrying u!
Alright now lets video chat so I can xshow u my dick! Hahahaha
I would have done the walk of shame but I couldnt walk
I had the most spectatular hardon this morning. I think it was trying to reach you in Wisconsin.
I love having hate sex.
I just got cash back from buying a pregnancy test so that I can buy a case of joose. My life is in shambles.
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
I'm not entirely sure what happened last night, but I think I dislocated my kneecap during an epic Mario Kart battle...
MY TWIN SISTER IS ENGAGED. I REPEAT, MY SCREW UP OF A SISTER IS ENGAGED. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I'll be there in 20 with vodka.
I'm just like... Utterly amazed that we're still alive at this point. Who'da thunk it....
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
I'm at my friends house alone, she's at spin class so I'm wearing her engagement ring and eating buffalo wings. It's 9:30am. Happy Valentine's Day.
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
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