we have officially lost it.
I woke up and my panties were thumbtacked to his wall. Out of my reach.
No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
Also...you were trying to touch his balls without him noticing
He sat there and debated the pros and cons of hooking up with me
Alright. I will breast feed the first person to get here.
You need to stop having girl talk with the guys I'm sleeping with.
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
i swear to god if you did anything to my honey bunches ill remove all the oats and shove them up your dickhole then play pinata with my foot to knock them all back out
Is "I am going to murder you if you keep sending me requests that I cannot fulfill" unprofesh?
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
Why do all the Father's Day cards talk about what a great dad they are? Why can't there be one that says something like "Thanks for sticking it to mom and making me possible, your sperm was appreciated."
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
So what's it like to be pregnant?
It feels like I'm hungover and when I was drunk I was kicked off a mechanical bull and then trampled.
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
Randomize
