i've been throwing up a lot lately. my guess is hangover but who knows morning sickness is always an option
McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
Is there a nice way to say "I like you, but I hate your dick?"
Okay, lets just agree to keep all cutlery related activities to a minimum.
I think I just fucked my first person born during the Clinton administration
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
You pretended to pelvic thrust my mother on the boat while my 92 year old grandmother looked on. Thanks.
I've figured out why I love winter sex. Because I make them leave the beanie on, and we all know I love a man in a beanie.
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
There is an alarming amount of food in my bra.
I figured you were on something. You're way too happy right now to be sober
Dude I think the cat just licked the coke plate
Who loses their virginity to fucking Flo Rida
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
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