I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
You can't date a girl from every country.
I'm the captain planet of women
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
We listened to Rod Stewart Pandora and slow danced in the shower.
You kept going up to guys in plaid and screaming "are you a lumberjack" in their faces
Living room floor. I asked him to give me a back rub. He did. And smoothly transitioned that to foreplay, then basically threw me on the floor. My vagina hurts. He deserves another Christmas present.
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
I know what you meant. If you want babies in time for your birthday, we gonna need either a time machine or a ski mask.
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
Finally liberated my Star Trek DVD from my booty call's house. Captain Kirk would be so proud.
I'm pretty sure I just smoked a chunk of cat food. Thought it was something else. No reply needed.
You were giving me all the reasons why being the big spoon is such a responsibility, and how you wish you were a girl cause the little spoon does nothing
We're pretty sure we got naked at Pride, so running the two blocks to your place in my underwear is a step up the dignity ladder really.
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