brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
Last night, you attempted to motor boat my vagina then proceeded to blow raspberries on it. Don't ever do that again.
This glow in the dark vibrator will get me through this power outage
He walked in AS I was cumming. Now even my father knows I'm a squirter.
Like if I don't roll around in my puke, the night will be a failure.
she pulled the sheets over her head to blow me but the static kept making little lightning bolts and I was too high and got really scared she was going to electrocute me.
Showering in my swimsuit in hopes of getting the beer smell out.
Tried to ride the mechanical bull pants less, got punched for making out with some lesbians wife, and you tipped the bartender with a can of skoal.
I regret nothing
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
Today's hangover is probably top 3 of all time. Just threw up in an envelope. I'm on the ferry and didn't want to get out to puke over the side because I thought I might fall in the river.
My dick has a subreddit
The fake number she gave me was for Pappa John's. Now I have a large pepperoni on the way.
Did you put my shoes in the freezer.
Nope. I did however put them in the kiddie pool you pissed in in the living room before Tyler put them in the freezer. Ass hole.
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