i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
Seriously, it was like sucking my thumb.. and im not even saying that to be spiteful b/c he is a really nice guy.
somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
He barely got in the door before she began to shriek like a banshee and punch him. His rainbow wig is still hanging from the front porch as a "warning to all other clowns".
Yeah well tell that to drunk me. She seems to have no standards or gender preference.
Are you coming to class or was the dick pic this morning your way of saying not today?
Package arrived for me from the gf while she's on vacation..under the bed bondage kit and new lingerie...my boner could drive to the airport
Overheard-"sex" and "giblet gravy" in the same sentence. Best thanksgiving ever.
I saved him in my phone as "Well-Hung Burrito Savior." I love Taco Tuesday.
reason #1 why i should never live alone: i haven't put pants on since she left 26 hours ago. and ive made spaghetti 3 times.
Thursday is not a good day to become a felon... It's bingo night
I had my first "Damn Kids/When I Was That Age" rant at work today. We need to drink this feeling out of me. NOW.
I can't remember the last time I saw a penis in person that I didn't see a million times on text first
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