Doo rag and shades in the bar. You are missing your future husband.
Fuck appropriateness.
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
Dignity is for republicans.
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
He fell asleep and they duct taped him to the floor. He's pissed.
omg dinner turned into a foam party this is weiriiid
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
Her Grandmother felt me up AND paid for dinner. If she doesn't get her shit together I'm gonna be her Step Grandfather.
I mean you guys are my friends and all but if you fuck with me I will not hesitate to set you on fire
Considering how much money I just spent on slutty lingerie, it is totally appropriate for me to be plucking my nipple hair right now. Right?
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
We go out, we get drunk, we watch Star Wars, we pass out. What's wrong with this tradition?
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan
Randomize
