well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
how soon is too soon after the break-up to ask for my condoms back?
Little spoons don't ask big questions
23 Roommates Share Secrets Their Roomie Thinks They Don’t Know
A good Q tip ear swabbing is better than bad sex.
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
Oh the joys of strong arming a man into exclusivity
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
I think he offered to cook me dinner or cook me for dinner. Not really sure. Just smiled and nodded.
29 Cringeworthy Situations People Realized They Shouldn’t Be In
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
You have a roommate and cry when you see my dick
On a side note...my DUI lawyer just snapchatted me. This is the exact moment in time when I realized my like IS a joke.
Is her dick bigger than yours?
Your final is gonna be as easy for you as getting into straight girls' pants is for me.
We watched ESPN, hooked up, got waffles. You know, a typical weekend.