Id settle for living inside the pirates of the carribean ride.
ugly people sure do ruin things
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
don't worry about the neighbors I'm like 99% sure all that snow covered a good portion of our vomit
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
So Ive been fucking her for the past couple months and i just found our that my grandfather and her grandmother were fuck buddies for a while. I feel like this is a new awesome family tradition that skips a generation.
I just realized that I'm gonna have to lower my standards if I want random head.
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
She clicked her fingers, said "here boy!", and pointed at her vagina.
Here you are just trying to masturbate and I'm talking to you like your an initiate for some secret society.
With everyone putting up pictures of their moms on Facebook it's time to go single MILF hunting.
Margaritas just taste better when they're bigger than your head
I'm pretty sure I just smoked a chunk of cat food. Thought it was something else. No reply needed.
You tried to tip the Uber driver with a meatball sub. Then, when he refused your meatball sub...you demanded he take you to the corner with the hookers. The valet has your keys and water balloons. I'm glad you're only in Chicago for the weekend.
Randomize
