Flirting with the rich sleazy owner of the club: 1 way ticket to free sushi, drinks, and VIP passes. FUck! im better with older men than i am with babies and dogs
he looks like a really good dad on facebook
You were doing downward dog and puking off my deck at the same time.
There are so many birds around me. And squirrels. I feel like that chick from Enchanted...but like if she had a dick and made poor life decisions.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Check having sex on the rocks and dirt on the peak of saddleback mountain off my list.
I felt like a god.
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
Last night he ate BBQ Pringles out of my boobs...I feel like it was moderately productive
Someone snapchat me a pic of you topless laying on the bar with Scotty pouring a bottle of tequila down your throat. IT'S NOT EVEN ELEVEN YET.
School starts next week
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Note to self. The tub labelled "not water" does not contain water.
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
I have a bandage in my ass crack. In. My. Ass. Crack.
WEED BROWNIES! He put weed in my brownie mix! And he got it from YYYYOOOOUUUU!
Look at the bright side mom. After 20 years dad is still capable of surprising you!
Shut up Max.
Welp, no use in crying over spilt milk. I can't unbang her.
i look like i'm walk-of-shaming but i'm really showered and re-clothed and rallying. i fool everyone
Randomize