i'm listening to "transmissions" by The Tea Party from like '97 and waxing my legs. fuck i'm awesome in my alone time
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
There could not be a more unattractive person. She just told me her period was so bad that she got sick. I think my penis retracted and killed himself
yeah my parents were only ten feet away and we somehow managed to do it in five different positions without them noticing
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
She started ignoring us once we told her we were out to celebrate your abortion. Who knew strippers could be judgemental?
Did you get your crutches off the street sign?
The George Foreman grill is melted. I don't know what other problems could arise.
Not entirely sure how I got drunk off 2 mimosas but here I am
I just want to buy drugs without having to pay an arm and a leg for it. Is that a horrible thing to ask for?
I mean, it's not like you can exactly complain to the manager and higher ups about it.
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
I'm eating go-gurt and drinking beer alone in the dark. This is why you shouldn't marry young.
Oh. Why can't it be something easy, like a punch card for blowjobs?
It smells like grilled cheese and sexual frustration
He just peed in the cab. I repeat..IN.
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