new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
I just caught my mom fingering herself in the bathroom...Im moving out.
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
just remembered that i started a tab for just myself at 50 cent beer night last night... i dont understand my life
I had to drink heavily last night because I needed to forget that you told me you want to blow my dad.
Im doing shots of vodka in the bathroom covered in pillows.
Tornado warnings are fun!
He's blaming gravity for his problems right now, so put that in perspective
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
He called me at two in the morning to tell me he was throwing the tiny Thor hammer at moving vehicles. Apparently he missed the guy on the motorcycle.
I'm in the fetal position watching the little mermaid and trying not to die. When do you come home?
Great sex, the promise of us mixing our excellent genetics in the future, and access to drugs are mainly what's holding this relationship together at the moment
...I'm not a booty call or a pizza...you can't just call/text and expect to be eating me in an hour..
Currently putting together my outfit for this weekend, AKA a poster board that says "I'll cook you breakfast and do all your laundry, take me home." On front and back
Come home... I’m drinking and playing with knives
Get over here and bring your drill!!! The strippers next door need help installing a stripper pole by their pool
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