On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
I was in the bathroom and her cat just looked at my penis with a profound hatred.
In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
running the faucet water is not hiding the sound of you vomiting. fyi.
She was wasted talking to my dad about the hunger games than she passed out in the shower and flooded the hotel room...
So we played the stone cold theme song and continued to chug 2 beers at once and everyone just looked in shock
oh. oh my god. i just had lunch with my mom with semen still on my face.
I've got to stop fucking tourists. If Chicagos piazza is anything like their dicks. I'm moving.
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
My roommate randomally bought me two bags of pretzels. Worst "Sorry you can hear me fucking my boyfriend everynight" gift ever.
Also Fuck you Stephen King and Fuck the horse you rode in on, making me cry In front of my coworkers.
I woke up with a pube in my teeth...I'm disturbed cause we're both clean shaven
You asked me if I ever met a talking rock and when I said no, you looked me dead in the eye and said today was my lucky day then you crawled into a ball and started talking...that high.
I’m gonna stop you right there. The last time you had a “brilliant” idea, I woke up to my kitchen covered in flour and a javelin through my tv.
You were telling everyone in the bar that Jess gave you scurvy.
Randomize
