Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
Getting 10 cents back for every can is really just encouraging alcoholism.
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
hey im home...im not sure how this mcdonalds got here but whatever im gonna eat it anyway.
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
I can't believe that 100lb chick tackled me through a flight of stairs
Im 95% ready to shit behind 711
We're bowling witha frozen turkey in the hallway...ur missing out
I like that we've become good enough friends again that I can make fun of your penis without it being awkward
There is a drunk marine passed out on my porch. Mandy wouldn't sleep with him, Can you please come remove him?
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
His encouragement of my recreational drug use is the backbone of our nonrelationship. That, and rough animal sex and loud music.
Her ex was at the party her housemates were having. He knocked on her door asking how she was while we were going at it. Turns out they were trying to work things out. Don't think I'll ever forget his face when we walked out of her room.
I miss painting strippers for Christmas. Holidays not the same without glitter and body paint
I'll be your substitute stripper tonight.
Randomize
