We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
I don't want to have to wonder if I'm draining my pasta in the same side of the sink you pissed in
You dont ever try to use your dick as a power washer to get bits of poop of the toilet bowl?
Using the ceiling fan to slice the hotdogs in mid-air can only be contributed to our liberal use of 1800.
she got the salsa and pickles out of the fridge looked at me and said what can i make with this
Dude, I had no choice. I was defending my genitals.
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
I feel so nauseous and all I want is string cheese. My life never makes sense.
last night i reached the point where my boob implants paid for themselves in free drinks. to celebrate lets go out and get more free drinks tonite.
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
My hungover walk of shame was interrupted by a stranger on a balcony throwing me a beer to shotgun... at 10 a.m....
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
There are far too many naked dudes in your apartment, and they aren't even watching porn. I mean seriously, they've got the Lion King on.
Please tell me you did not shit your Disney princess costume.
Randomize
