my hangover today makes thursday's feel like a bubble bath.
my mouth smells like i just ate out a crab.
Every morning i wake up and check his twitter like a horoscope
yeah that always happens. i'm like the where's waldo of parties. i never even know where the fuck i'm at.
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I don't remember her missing an ear while we were at the bar
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
Also, drinking coors light. Fuck that. Fuck that in the fucking face.
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ugh why does it have to be margarita Monday. Why can't it be pants off dance off beer pong but with jager Monday.
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
sometimes you just gotta rip off the nipple tape and get it done.
not only did I call my ex crying but drunk me also deleted the phone log so I had no warning when I saw him in class
At least your wife cheated on you. Women will feel bad for you. In a month there will boy bands that are jealous of your dick
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