is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
side note. good thing you didn't come to drunk breakfast. we were judged by children.
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
I think im gonna bang this 35 year old at a kids birthday party in the bathroom at this house while the kids open the presents.
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In a weird way, I don't want to stalk him on Facebook. I want to find out what's wrong with him the old-fashioned way. Is this what it means to be romantic?
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
Got dumped. Now accepting nominations for my extra Dave Mathews ticket. No xboyfriends. Must cast final votes by Monday. Good luck everyone
I'm pretty sure I just gave myself third degree burns from punching my pizza.
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After we got done he told me to hold his penis because it helps him fall asleep
Split a bottle of Johnny Walker and then decided to eat a shit ton of peanut butter. That was a rough bed to wake up in
Apparently I told him he would be good for human sacrifice.
I really appreciate you taking the time to blur out my excessive boob cleavage for instagram
You can't leave me alone in times of distress because I will fuck things ππ
He motorboated me, gave me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
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