All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
currently hungover, lying in bed and cutting cheese with my drivers license. ashamed? not even a little bit.
Had her hockey skates on in the house. Whole floor is ruined.
At some point last night Lemondrops turned into me doing shots of vodka and eating sugar packets at the bar.
Man, only now that I'm single is it painfully obvious that I have zero booty calls in waiting. This could be a cold winter
all time personal low: room service guy going "You want french fries AND onion rings???"
I can't wait for the day Google doesn't remind me that I got arrested for having 3 shots called 'frog cum' lined up in front of me.
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
I'm watching sex and the city with my wine and Wendy's. I'm not sure if this is single woman empowerment or not.
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
Considering we almost incited a riot on behalf of LGBT rights I have to say that was the best time for our moral compass to turn south.
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
wait. i have to tell u something. and it has nothing to do with dildos or spiders
The people around me on the bus dont know im wearing glowsticks under my clothes. I feel like a super hero.
My parents are coming to visit the 28th. How bad is it that I put a reminder in my phone to "hide sex toys"?
Randomize
