I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
I feel miserable, can't drink that much when I go out
We've been saying that since '98
Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
maybe i'll make good life choices and keep my legs closed. periodically txt me friday and saturday night saying "baby carrot round 2" that should stop me.
This is your morning news. Today at 5 pm I will be going out of town until the 29th. If you would like some great sex before I leave, please contact me. The available packages are: a house call, an outdoor excursion, or a delivery style in-car quickie. available only while supplies last.
Get your penis over here NOW. emergency
I feel like an elephant shit on me and left me to be miserable
Don't send the creepy guy a picture of your penis. That's my Christmas wish
He said I kept trying to give him directions back to my house in Rhode Island, and that I started crying when he told me I live in Phoenix.
You can't spell "party" without "RA."
You know what else you can't spell it without? "Gonna get fired."
You screamed out "happy birthday Jesus" followed by chugging Bacardi straight out the bottle
Such a shame we didn't work out. We would've been a power couple producing NFL linemen :/
My one night stand from last weekend is now taking me on a date this weekend. How is this my life?
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