someone threw a dead crab at me
Text me right after you finish, I want to know how the ghetto fleshlight worked out
How about I just call you while I'm doing it so you can hear my reaction?
dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
Dude love is like an itch. You fuckin scratch it, then it itches more, then you scratch it and it itches more, and before you know it, there is semen everywhere.
you are insane
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
He said my labia gave my vagina a "cute personality"
You're the only true friend I have, if true friendship is based off who would be there for me at 4am during a boxed wine crisis.
I need to pack up my vagina and leave. We only do bad things together.
You must have my penis confused with someone else's...which is disappointing
In going to go underground and live with the mole people for a while.
Hurricane Harvey ruined my dick appt. WTF?!
Wait wait wait. You are actually taking advice from this lunatic?
This is the girl who got a balloon full of cocaine through security no questions asked. Of course I'm taking her advice.
Valid.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
I think I was judged by a squirrel this morning during the walk...
Randomize
