i kept saying "bloody hell" in a ron weasley accent until i forcibly told myself to shut up
i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
Just saw a guy wearing pink jeans and i bet he's straight. Fuck 2009.
she moved to the other side of town, do you realize how far i gotta walk to get a blow job???
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After 2 hrs of driving around looking for him, we just found him sleeping in the bed of my truck with the cover closed, cuddling with the spare tire.
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
He is crying over the toilet and his friends just came in and tried to make him take another jello shot.
ALWAYS CAPS LOCK. IS THERE EVER A SITUATION THAT DOES NOT CALL FOR CAPS LOCK? NO.
Sexting? Sexting in caps lock seems rather unnerving.
I WANT YOUR BODY AND I WANT IT NOW.
I rest my case.
drunk grocery shopping was not as bad of an idea as i thought, this salmon cat food tastes a lot like tuna
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Worst walk of shame man. They had a fire drill at 7am, had to walk out of her all girl dorm wearing my Everday I'm Hustling sweater
I'm not sorry for loving America more than everyone else
I wasn't going to just ask my parents for a damn vibrator for christmas
I feel like the dump I just dropped is the most successful thing I've done so far today.
Woke up next to a half eaten Philly Cheesesteak. Honestly probably one of the top 3 things I've ever woken up next to.
Nah, just stick him in a closet with some cheetos, a blunt and soda. The darkness will calm him down until Mallory can be located.
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