In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
and before you know it i was laying next to him at 2 in the morning with penis and sadness on my breath.
Dude, I just went to take a piss and looked at my ballsack... Underneath was labled "L" and "R"
can u get pink eye on your cock?
she is using a fork to eat popcorn and refuses to drink gatorade out of anything but a margarita glass... did i mention the popcorn is on a plate?
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
You dont lie about slip and slides
if you had such a terrible roommate you would understand. jacking off in his conditioner is just the start.
At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila
It's not ok to announce to a group of people playing beer pong that a girl put her finger in your butt last night. I now know this
and i do believe that will be the last time you send me a photograph of our mother in her underwear.
Dont judge the spank bank, just be happy that you were deposited there.
Don’t say some truly stupid shit like that to me. In a kitchen. Where the knives are kept
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