if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
Just bought a disco ball for 5 dollars, of course we're drinking tonight.
Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
So instead of asking me for my number, he asked for my dad's because he wanted to "thank the man that helped create those tits."
Wake up. We're going shopping for booze and samurai swords.
If the world ends now I want you to know I was on my favorite toilet fighting the good fight.
I like to feed my guinea pigs before I get stoned. In case they get contact high and get the munchies. It's only polite.
its like a catch 22, sucks that you've stopped, but its like a vagina high five
That's what jaeger bombs out of teacups will do to you.
I'm about to turn myself in when I'm less hungover.
Go forth my friend, but don't do any of that fruitful and multiplying shit.
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
Why is there multiple peanut butter and toasts stuck to the fridge door?
Chicks dig it when you smell like bong water and frebreeze.
Randomize
