Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
you kept shouting how the only tree you would hump is an elm tree because they're under populated
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
there was a trail of blood coming out of one of the bathroom stalls. thought of you
got extra credit for showing up to class before a holiday. it hit me 5 minutes later that she meant easter....
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
you took a potato out of your pocket and just started eating it raw. don't know where the potato came from though
21st birthday = success
the cab driver said that we weren't the worst shit show he'd ever seen, CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!!
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
The boys wrestled in the living room for the last condom while the girls chanted, "THE LAST MELON."
The perfect man would keep a whisky sour in my hand and give me endless sex. I really don't think that's too much to ask for.
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
I’ve cut back on drinking and now my body can’t fight off all the bad germs without the alcohol. That’s why I keep getting sick
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
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