Do you know my vagina holds 14 pints of water?
i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
There is no way I'm taking advice from somone who's idea of a balanced diet consists of vodka and lemon detox juice
You insisted we help some homeless guy put up posters for his missing pet alligator so we left you there because they were really just Chinese takeout menus.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
I THINK I JUST JOINED A GANG. PLEASE PICK ME UP.
bad news.. campus security walked me home last night and when i tried to tell them where i lived they assured me they knew where our house was.
Last thing I remember is ranting about hating pants. Woke up this morning pants less. Couldn't find them, decided to leave. Driving without pants is surprisingly liberating.
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
took shots off of a myriad of fake boobs last night. It was glorious.
He wants to make me arch my back "like I'm having an exorcism". Not sure if I'm turned on or freaked out.
I just spent the last three days trying to hook up with a dude for his pool privileges
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
Well 1) stay calm 2) stay safe 3) drink more
it’s about to be september and all i keep thinking is what if i go (another) full calendar year without having sex?
Randomize