he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
she told me she sucks everyone's dick but mine because mine is too big and "hard to suck" i need to reevaluate the girls i fall in love with.
I've never heard a "this is the reason why i dont suck your cock" explanation go in that direction
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
ill give you the fast version. Hooked up with 17 year old coworker while housestting for my boss
The ice cream man just told me to use protection.
My fingers feel amazing. Their going like 100 MPH!!
HOLY SHIT. SHIT THAT IS HOLY. HOLY OF THE SHIT.
And tell the hostess not to worry, she's narcoleptic and fell asleep on the way to the bar, but she'll be fine in a few minutes.
Given he decided my interview was a date, showed up drunk and insisted on carrying me everywhere, we weren't off to a good start.
I love THIS fish, the rest of the ocean can go fuck itself. I am ahab and he is my whale
I was able to hide the fact that I had just shit in my pants, and then wupped her ass at FIFA
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
I've had more orgasms than showers this week.
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
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