You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
Apparently in gay bars the restroom signs are just a formality. Its a free for all in there
I'm on strict orders from her to keep sleeping with you until you give her a job next summer.
he gets drunk and then tries to eat the lasers at the dance club
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
High enough to ask the woman at best buy if she ever feels like she's swimming. and telling the man outside that he smells like happy juice.
how did operation slutty penguin go?
pretty epic. there was a guy who was also dressed as a penguin. i asked him if he would keep my eggs warm while i went fishing for the winter
In other news my cocaine dealer got arrested for heaving some kid out of a fourth story window.
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
You grabbed the hot guy that was making out with his girlfriend all night, slurred "I need to borrow this" then shoved your hand down his pants. All because you thought your ex walked into the bar. It was majestic in its shitshowness.
If I walk downstairs and Kelly is fucking in the laundry room again I'm gonna die
The guy I hooked up with last night left me alone with his dog AND IT JUST SHIT ON THE FLOOR. WHAT DO I DO
I have to hand it to her. In my heyday I took home the 'biggest shitshow of the night' award 9 times out of 10. But I passed the torch on to her last night, and she went skipping merrily far and away with it into the enchanted world of aggressive alcoholism. Is this 30?
336: Dude I lost my.phone Wednesday night at a party and just found it, three days later, on the lacrosse field....what the actual fuck.
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