I would wrestle an alligator for a bj right now
He'll choke me during sex but he won't eat a strip of bacon. Vegetarians are weird.
She asked me to go inside, make myself a drink and slip into something a little more naked.
Trevor is horny so he just called me to tell me all the things that he would like to do with his future wife. That's a new one.
either i huffed spraypaint or ate out that makeup artist. you decide.
Hi I haven't talked to you since you bought legal marijuana-are you still stoned?
I woke up with my earring stuck inbetween my tits. Somehow you fucked my earring out and my boobs saved it. I'm pretty impressed with both of us right now.
I know I've never told you this before.. but Gyro sauce makes everything okay.
Today, my weed came in a pokéball. I officially love my dealer.
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
When's the last time you had sex near some ducks?
I think my liver just tried to kill me, we need to slow down
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
I need your help immediately! I sorta kinda sliced my foot off at the ankle with my new kitana. Bring your cooler, ice and some hospital road beers.
Randomize
