my being single is dangerous.
After we finished he asked if I knew if it was a boy or girl. Diet. Starts. Now.
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
I really hope that wasn't actually his first time. Because if my first time was anything like that I would NEVER have sex again.
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drunk doesnt even begin to explain it. he said he was going to get playing cards from the lobby and came back 20 minutes later with a full set of sheets.
Someone woke me up and gave me a sprite and some pills. I put them in my belly button. Trust no one.
Were making Christian mingle accounts. First one to get laid doesn't pay bar tabs for a month.
Challenge accepted. See you in hell.
Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex.
Pretty sure the guy I hooked up with Saturday gave me a buy one get one free coupon for chipotle. Who said nice guys don't exist?
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Welp, just took a tab of acid and cracked one of three bottles of champagne... Mondays ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯
How'd your date go last night?
Well I blacked out at 1:30 and woke up naked in not-my-date's bed with an uneaten Jimmy John's sandwich.
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
No, he came home, unscrewed all of the lightbulbs, and threw them in the sink.
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
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