Is there a reason "Call me when you're legal" is written on my arm? I'm 22..
Can't imagine what could be worse than pet-naming your penis, but I'll let it go.
I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.
yeah, that's what i said too. right before i tackled that street sign.
Did a bunch of gravity bongs and am watched hours of Frozen Planet. There is nothing in the world I want more than to hug a polar bear.
IDK DUDE BUT HE TIED IT WITH A SHOELACE SO I GOTTA FREE SHOELACE OUTTA THE DEAL. THIS GIVES A NEW MEANING TO LACED DRUGS
I feel like there should be a 'roommate information section' of the paperwork when there's a chance you'll be given pain killers.
Your friend gave me you're number. I was the guy locked behind the book shelf.
I think you have the wrong number, but I hope you escaped your library-prison?
Guess who just hooked up with a guy who was wearing a shirt from his mom's "dress up closet"?!
I have a weird question... did you bite my back last night?
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
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