Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
It was so delicious I was introducing it to people. Guy from my psych class was like "This is my girlfriend, Erica," and I was like, "This is my milkshake, Oreo."
Some chick just tried to plug her vodka into the wall.
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
Yessssss I diiiiid! I enjoyed 38% of it. There are 4 qualifications and 2 were good. 1. There is a penis in my vagina (Pass) 2. It's a big penis (Fail) 3. The sex is long and exciting and makes me sweat and have 6 pack abs (fail) 4. I got off (uhhh potential to pass...)
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
If I win the contest of drinking the most water I get a chicken nugget.
well his attempt to make a white russian with instant coffee, gone off milk, and that weird probably illegal vodka we bought the other day isnt going well
I need something for rope burns and an inner ear infection. Separate incidents, FYI..
I woke up this morning with 3 phone numbers, a red Chinese New Year envelope with cash in it, and a winning scratcher all stuffed in my bra. I'd say it was a pretty successful Thursday night.
When did i become the Rickety Cricket of my own life?
Making friends with the guy who had alcohol-infused whipped cream was the best decision I made all night.
Psssh like you wouldn't lick BBQ sauce off my nipples.
Oh I had the weirdest dream in which I was an archeologist stealing a golden dildo from a snobby British person
Randomize
