He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
u were so high that u chewed on candle wax for an hour
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
I'm on the strip, it's like a mini new years eve. Some girl just got taken away on a stretcher with her meter margarita in her hand claiming it's trophy for being awesome. Damn tourists are lightweights.
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
all i remember is him tryin to explain to the girls how to effectively hit the strip club with their bfs
hes actually pretty persuasive when he drinks
Currently emptying half-full wine bottles from fridge into my mouth and refilling with water for later. Drunk survivalist recycling!
were facing impending death from north korea and were sitting here snorting tylenol to get high.....where did our lives go wrong?
You went to the animal party as a hoodrat. You won the most creative costume contest.
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
I made a bong out of my deodorant today. Did you?
I need your opinion, is it ACTUALLY sweet that a booty call offered to walk me home with an umbrella because it was raining, or is that just low standards?
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
Guess whose grandma smokes weed?
Randomize
